This blog: well, two years got me to thinking. Not why I do it, I know why I do it, but why I keep it a public website. I've always said, I keep this blog first and foremost for me. Secondly, for my daughters. But you, YOU are the reason I keep it public. Just when I think this blog has run out of steam, or I keep posting the same shit over and over, or who really cares anyway?... I'll receive a letter, or an e-mail, or a facebook message, or a phone call, or an in-person "I love how on your blog..." and I'll realize there really are people out there reading this. Friends, relatives, strangers. How wonderful. And weird. And connected.
^First time I've witnessed Juniper drawing with intention.^
Last week opened with the most beautiful, generous letter.
^Junebug's first go at watercolor.^
:: Juniper falls asleep in her own room, but lately, she'll slip into our bed in the wee morning hours. Sometimes at 3am, sometimes at 7. Secretly, we love it. My husband hardly ever writes anything down (except love notes to yours truly), but this morning he got up and wrote this:
As I lie awake in the growing morning light I can just make out the prominent features of my daughter’s face lying next to me. Her brow, cheeks, jaw line are well defined but the rest of her features are blurry and I start to imagine and think I can see what she will look like as a child, teenager, then woman. And my mind drifts off as I think about all the adventures will have together, the joy we’ll have, the laughs, and of course a few tears.
^Skiing over tire tracks!! Not any more, baby.^
Then I snap back to the present, lying in bed with our whole family, and realize that I just need to enjoy now, because she’s going to grow up much too soon.
Juniper is napping again. I lay out a camp pad on our bedroom floor and give her the choice between our bed and the floor and we hunker down as a trio. If Hazel is awake, she and I will slip out after Juniper falls asleep. Yesterday, as we nestled in for our nap, Juniper leaned over, kissed Hazel on the head and with a smile on her face said, "I so happy."
Truly, Juniper saves the most genuine love for her little sister. If she happens to do something to make Hazel cry--say, bending her fingers the wrong way or pushing too hard on her belly--Juniper gets stricken and starts to wail. It's as though someone's just told her she's a bad mother. It is both heartbreaking and endearing to watch.
:: You've no doubt either experienced or heard of the big, western dump. We got a shit-ton of snow, then some rain, then more snow. I am super excited to ski again. This was last week (before the big dump):
^My man is towing a sleeping Juniper in the trailer.^
(I realized after last friday's post, you probably thought we were doing some gnarly downhill skiing. But no, just mellow, skiing the public land behind our house.)
:: Evidence of what happens in our house when I go away for an evening:
:: Lately, Juniper's been calling me "mom". Already? That seems so grown up: "What's this, mom? Where'd it go, mom? I want the purple one, mom." And, whispered, "I remember the bears, mom. What's the bear's name, mom?" And, "I remember the grocery store, mom. Juniper go to the grocery store and Juniper see the bears." And, "What's that, mom? Where's another one, mom? That's pretty funny, mom."
In the meantime, this MOM's been having some strong urges to MAKE...
^Booties for a friend due soon.^