Sunday, September 15, 2013

where I go in stormy weather

This parenting gig.

Almost predictably, my family will sail along smooth seas for several months before another storm hits, we take on too much water, the bail bucket gets a hole and the sail itself is ripped off and floating somewhere in the north pacific.  We are cold, sleep deprived, low on food and floating without direction.  
Just when I'm quite certain we're sinking, that we've lost the sail and will forever be floating aimlessly in the north pacific ocean, I read this blog.  The author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids, Dr. Laura Markham's website is a balm for my parenting soul.  So when my almost-four year old melts down and yells at the toddler-gym supervisor to GO AWAY YOU BAD GUY! or she calmly tells her good friend, "You have to share otherwise you can't come to my house;" or if I drive a different way home and she breaks down and screams, "NO!  MAMA YOU DRIVE THE OTHER WAY!  GO. THE. OTHER. WAY. NOW!"  Just when I think we have done something horribly wrong (and where did she even get the expression 'bad guy' anyway?), I read her blog.  And I am quickly reminded that four year olds are famous for their bossiness, their bully-like experimentation with power; that they need to be heard and acknowledged, they need empathetic limits and guidance with their emotional tsunamis.  

Whew.  We're not drowning.  We just have some work to do.

Her website is packed with everything we need to patch our sailboat back together and get moving along in--as Juniper would say--this big round world.  

Two weeks into this screaming, tantruming world of an almost-four year old trying to give up naps, she started preschool.  And swimming lessons.  And just like that, we are scheduled again.  (That said, I am quite a fan of unschedules, so we still have a bit of that too.)  

:: First day of preschool.  Juniper was excited.  She jumped right in like an old pro (but covered her face as we entered the building).  Hazel was excited too and apparently thought it was a family outing.  She kept saying, "Me!  Preschool!  Backpack!"  She even hung her backpack on the hook.  Juniper was so engrossed with reading rug that she barely looked my way when I said, See you when you play outside.  This year, she is totally ready.  Last year, with a baby at home, I needed her to go to school.  In hindsight, she was so little!  Not this year.  Now she's a big kid.       
Psssst.  I've mentioned Dr. Laura's book before (I was hesitant to do so...parenting is so full of personal preferences...and yet, as they say, It takes a village) and I'm so glad I did based on all the feedback I've heard from you all : )    


  1. I have passed that book on to many people because of you!! Thanks so much.

    Have you read that link going around on Facebook about "What a Preschooler should Know"?

    Good stuff.

  2. aw I love those back to school shots. So cute!

    I read her book and I love it! Actually your post has reminded me to go back to it as I was this week wondering where i had gone wrong when my 5 year old was not so gentle with his friends at school. It feels so awful when they do these things but I have to remember they are still learning how to be people, well so I am really lol xxx

  3. how sweet and they are adorable--still remember preschool-- noah going to south eugene high-so brothers could help if there was a problem--now he is first year of high school at churchill--goes so quick-his preschool years helped to form who he is--caring and accepting of everyone--we dont have huge diversity but noah always managed to have that in his life and friends


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